Forbidden Planet
The storyline itself deserves a big mention as it’s got to be one of the funniest plots I’ve seen in a while. You play the part of Cryptosporidium 136, a member of the Furon race of aliens. Without going into too much detail, you’re race has, for a very long time, reproduced by cloning alone and somewhere along the line someone forgot to add the genitals in (much to the dismay of pubescent boys all over the planet). Now, with the Furon’s DNA stocks running out and no way to rejuvenate them, you have to go looking for more. Fortunately, it’s not long until Furon DNA is found, mingled in with Human DNA… and so starts your mission to collect as much DNA as you can from Human brainstems in a bid to save your race.
With clever use of cutscenes and some great dialogue you watch as a previous clone of yourself manages to crash his saucer in the desert (Roswell) and get taken captive. And it’s at this point you’ll enter the game with the task of getting your technology back from the humans as well as harvesting their DNA. Cue 20 story driven missions guiding you through from first contact in the countryside to full on mayhem in the city. Spattered throughout are some hilarious lines from Crypto as he meets new species and has new experiences. A great example is when he first lands, having not the faintest clue what a human looks like…
Superbly, Crypto lands in the middle of dairy farm and tries to communicate with the surrounding docile, and mildly surprised, herd of cows. This level acts a training mission of sorts, giving you a quick run through of your abilities. Using your superior mind powers you can scan other creatures thoughts to see what they’re thinking and even temporarily take on their form, which comes in handy in some of the pseudo-stealth missions later on. You also have psycho-kinetic powers enabling you to move objects and people with your mind. These mind powers come at a cost and you need to keep your brain meter topped up to be able to use them.
You do this by collecting DNA from humans you encounter within each level. How you do this is up to you as there’s an array of weaponry to help you in your task, some of which just blow stuff up which is a lot of fun but won’t get you much DNA, and other which harvest the DNA while you get on with something else more interesting, like blowing stuff up. As you work your way through the levels, you can buy new weapons or upgrade what you already have buy trading in the DNA you’ve collected.. so the Ion Detonator and Disintegrator Ray along with the much vaunted Anal Probe can all be yours eventually as well as upgrades to your saucer’s weapons and armour.
You then work your way through the 20 levels, harvesting DNA, taking on human form, hurling stuff around with your psychic powers and generally causing destruction and mayhem wherever you go… which is where the game hits it’s first stumbling block. As fun as the action is, after the first five levels or so, you’ll find that you’ve pretty much seen all Destroy All Humans has to offer. The gameplay itself is just a case of running around zapping people and collecting their DNA, then repeat… and repeat… and repeat. Some variety in the gameplay is offered by the stealth mission where you have to assume a human disguise using your mind powers, but in this form you lose a lot of your abilities and can frequently fins yourself draining your brain meter before you’ve got where you need to go. In fact, being disguised only makes certain parts of the game easier and often you’ll find that instead of sneaking in just blasting your way through making full use of your arsenal of anal probes (geddit?) is a quicker, more enjoyable experience.
